Anger is a very tough emotion to maintain for any length of time. It saps your strength and your enthusiasm for life. It blocks your joy and your happiness. It’s especially bad when you’re angry at the creator of the universe. That’s where I’ve been for the past six months or so, but, today, I’m happy to report that I am no longer angry at God!
I was actually going to write this post a few days ago, but it was originally going to be a passive-aggressive piece on how I was no longer angry at God even though He didn’t really deserve it. I’m so very happy that I never wrote that piece. It would have made writing this much more difficult.
Today, I realized that I still don’t understand everything. I don’t understand why Cindy was taken from me. I don’t understand what God has planned for my life. I don’t understand why sin came into this world and why we must suffer it. I also realized that I don’t really need to understand. What I need to know is that I NEED JESUS! I believe that he came to Earth and paid the ultimate price for my sins and the sins of the entire world. I gratefully accept that wonderful gift.
Earlier, I prayed a sincere prayer of repentance and asked God to take me back into His embrace and I asked friends to pray for this hurting soul who so desperately longs to find his way home.
I don’t understand everything, but I don’t have to. I know what I need to know right now. There is a hole in my life that I’ve been trying to fill with possessions and with anger. When people would tell me that only Jesus can fill that space, I would get angry at them because I didn’t want to hear it. I was too angry, but they were right. I have a Cindy-shaped hole in my heart and Jesus is the only patch for it.
Today, I am at peace. My heart is calm and my spirit is soaring. It is a wonderful day.
…the Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord. (Job 1:21)
I hope you have a wonderful day. May God bless you richly.